and now my baby is NINE

I still remember the day I found out I was pregnant with you.
It was a Saturday.. Dad was out, we had friends coming for dinner.
I took the test. I called dad, and said "when you get home, we really need to talk".
Looking back, those were not the BEST words I could have used!

I remember being scared... actually, TERRIFIED is more like it. I had this thing growing inside me. Relying on me to make the right choices and decisions... not just for now, but for the rest of my life..
No more little selfish bubble...

June 28th, 2003 looked like this...

You were my little Yoda.. You weighed 4 pounds, 1/2 ounce (1.84kg). Super tiny, but hitting all the right marks.
We were separated from each other for 10 days. You were in the special care nursery. I set my alarm for every 3 hours to go and do this...

I didn't want the nurses to hold you.. We were only allowed one cuddle a day, and I would wait until dad could come in after work, so we could both hold you.
The times I was awake were spent staring at this little miracle through a plastic window, opening a hole and touching you.
It was hard. It was scary. You were amazing.

Nine years on, it is still scary (sometimes terrifying), and you are still amazing.
That is you, Jasper Alan Miles. Our son.

An amazing big brother

 A lover of cake

 A non - quitter (after finishing 20th in the cross country at school)

 A snuggle boy with his grandy and poppie

 A lover of ice-cream (with his mate for his birthday dinner)

 A kind and loving friend

 A silly cheeky boy who makes me laugh (especially when you rub ice cream on his chin, JUST for the photo!)

There is not a day that goes past that I don't tell you how much I love you. Even if I have growled at you for something earlier in the day.
You are amazingly brave, even though you think you arent. You are amazingly clever - even though you think you arent. You are amazingly funny - and you do think you are!!

No matter what else happens in this world, Jasper Alan, your mummy and daddy love you so very much.
Happy NINTH Birthday, my darling heart.

Love
mum.